One definition of insanity is ‘Repeating the same activity over and over again, expecting different results each time.’
I found that up until recently that my walk with God was uncannily close to that definition. I would be coasting along, feeling that I was right with God, and he was right with me, and then I would slip up. The hurdles might be different; Anger or lust or greed or selfishness, or complacency, but the result was yet another re-dedication to God. Whether at a Christian conference, or at an ‘alter call’ at church, or in a moment alone with God. I just had to say ‘God, I re-dedicate my life to you, I am so sorry, I will never do that again, I promise’ or something similar. I would go along feeling right again, until the next time, when the re-dedication would have to take place. I thought that Grace was the ability for me to re-dedicate myself, when all I was doing was living in the old testament, continually bringing sacrifices for sin, when there was no need.
Then I started to discover true Grace. I began to realise, and am continually learning how, through Jesus, that messing up is OK, and it is a part of the sanctification process. I am discovering the miracle that true Grace is so amazing, that it’s very presence performs the inner healing from the stuff that causes the slip-ups in the first place, and that gradually, the hurdles get smaller.
